Out of Ones Control
by MissB8604
Summary: CollinsAngel...Collins loses someone very dear to him and he takes the responsiblity that has been thrown to him on his own. Group mentioned as well.
1. Finding Him

**Author's Notes: Something I came up with at 3:30am in the morning. I was reminded when my dad didn't come home for a long, which scared me. I plan on putting up numerous chapters so look out for me. Check out What's Out There and Tomorrow Comes they're my babies. **

**I OWN NOTHING.**

**Please read, review and enjoy.**

_**Italics are thoughts.**_

Angel sat on the couch reading a really good book she found at the thrift store when she out that day. It was just a regular day, Collins had to work late today, and he was tutoring. As Angel delved further into the book, she didn't realize that she fell asleep on the couch.

Prying her eyes open enough to see the clock which read 10:30pm, Angel looked around for Collins who never woke her anyway when she was sleeping.

"Lover are you here?" She said sweetly, but all that answered her was the sound of an ambulance in the distance.

Placing a bookmark into her book and closing it, Angel walked into the bedroom to look for her missing lover.

"Collins?" She called out to him. There weren't too many places he could be. When she glanced over at the clock on the bedside table, she read it again not wanting to believe it was as late as it was. Way too late for Collins not to be home.

_Don't panic. He's fine._

She halfheartedly shrugged and walked over to the dishes preparing the other sink so she could wash them.

_What if he's hurt?_

Angel absentmindedly shook her head, no he wasn't hurt. He's fine.

"I'll just wait a little longer before I call Mark and Roger. He'll be home soon." She told herself out loud. But her words weren't giving her any comfort.

Angel had never washed dishes so quickly in her life. It was now 11:15 and still there was no Collins walking through the door.

_Oh God what if he got mugged again?_

Walking over to the phone, she picked it up dialing the number she knew so well.

SPPPEEEAAAKKKK

"Roger? Mark? It's Angel, pick up please."

After a minute or two of no answer, Angel placed the phone back on the hook. She could feel herself panic, but began to breathe deeply when she felt the knot in her stomach begin to get tighter.

_God dammit where is he!_

SPPPPEEEAAAKKKK

"Roger! Mark! Pick up the God damned phone!"

Immediately Roger picked up the phone. "Angel? What's the matter?"

"Do you know where Tom is?" Angel asked in the best tone she could manage.

"No we haven't seen him. Why, isn't he home?"

Why would Roger ask such a stupid ass question like that?

"No he's not here that's why I'm calling to see if you or Mark have seen him." The drag queen's tone was beginning to get harsh. "He said that he had to do some tutoring this evening, but I know it doesn't take that damn long to tutor someone."

"Just calm down Angel, I'm sure he's fine. He probably just got caught up with some stuff. He'll be home soon." Roger assured her.

Angel nodded her head. "Yeah I guess you're right. Sorry for bothering you, talk to you later."

"It's okay Ang; I'll be down at Mimi's so call there or here again to let us know he got home."

Sighing, Angel hung up the phone and looked around the apartment; it was so lonely without him.

After fixing herself a small dinner of bacon and eggs, Angel sat down on the couch with a skirt she was currently making. She couldn't concentrate though and pricked herself on the finger, which she never did.

"Fuck! Where is he!" she exclaimed throwing the skirt onto the coffee table. 12:00am the clock read.

Angel brought her knees to her chest, at a loss of what to do.

_Maybe I should go look for him...should I call Roger again? _

The drag queen knew that it wouldn't be good for her health if she went around Alphabet City at this time of night. She hated this feeling. Not knowing. Angel always had a plan, no matter what she did or where she went she always had a plan. But she didn't know what to do, and this besides the fact that the love of her life was gone was one thing she couldn't handle. She broke down. In between her terrified sobs she walked over to the phone, dialing the loft once more.

Mark picked up the phone, Roger must have told him about Collins. "Hello?"

"Mark." Angel said sobbing.

"Angel? What's wrong? Is Tom there?"

"No! I don't know where he is! He's not here!" She said crying loudly. "I'm so scared without him! Oh my God Mark, what if something bad happened to him?"

Mark tried to reason with his friend. "Calm down Angel. I'm going to get Roger and we're going to go look for him alright? I'll send Mimi down there to see you."

Trying to wipe away the tears that kept falling, Angel felt acutely satisfied with his answer. "Okay. Please find my Tom."

Angel placed the phone down and collapsed to the floor, burying her face in her hands. Collins knew that it worried Angel when he didn't come back when he said he would, what the hell was he doing? And most importantly, was he alright?


	2. Waiting

Author's Notes: I honestly love that all of you have reviewed and I wanted to let you know how much I appreciate it! I'm out of town for my cousin's graduation, but I knew that I couldn't hold another chapter from you so here you are! Thanks again.

I OWN NOTHING.

Please read, review and enjoy!

_Italics are thoughts._

Chapter Two 

As Angel stared at the clock, which now read 1:45am, she felt the worst must have happened. Not knowing how to react without anyone there to calm her down, Angel grabbed the lamp that sat on the table next to the couch and threw it against the wall shattering it to pieces. Since that was the only light that was on at the moment, the drag queen was left in the dark to think about the inevitable that must have happened. When she traveled across the room to grab one of Collins' books, a knock came at the door. Stopping in her tracks she ran over to the door tearing it open ready to tell Collins off, and rip his clothes off in the process.

"Thomas! Where the fuck have you-"

"No sign of him yet?" Mimi said standing in the doorway rubbing her arms for warmth.

Seeing that it wasn't her lover, Angel fell to the ground feeling helpless. Mimi immediately ran to her best friend's side cooing comforting words in her ear. Angel felt weak, like she had no direction if Thomas Collins wasn't with her. He had completely turned her world around, and she loved every moment of it.

"Oh God where is he!" Angel screamed out.

Mimi looked at her best friend, she'd never seen Angel this way. "Mark and Roger are out looking right as we speak sweets, they'll find him."

Angel was completely heartbroken. "Why didn't he call me? He always calls me Mimi! Always! No matter what. He always tells me every morning 'Baby, I love you, I'm going to work I'll call you.'!" The drag queen roughly wiped her tears away, causing scratches on her cheeks. "I talk to him at least two times a day when he's at work. Something has happened to him and he's out there somewhere and he needs me!"

The dancer just listened, at a complete loss for words. "Chica, he'll come home to you. He loves you. He'll come home to his Angel." Mimi thought for a second before speaking once more. "You know he can't live a day without you beside him or in his arms."

Angel fell apart again at her words.

_So much for trying to lighten the situation._

"Tom…" Was all Angel could say. She hugged her knees tightly against her chest, saying his name over and over again. "Baby where are you?" She whispered.

Mimi looked around for anything, anything that she could do to help. "Hey! How about I make you some hot chocolate?"

Angel said nothing, but continued to stare off into space. Mimi took that as her cue to go over to the kitchen.

"Oh! You guys have whip cream! I'll put it on the hot chocolate when I'm done okay Chica!"

Hearing the phone ring, Angel jumped up from her place in front of the door and over to it in a matter of seconds.

"HELLO! TOM! HELLO! ANSWER ME!"

"Angel, it's Mark."

"Oh, Hi Mark." Angel's depressed mood came upon her once more. "Did you find my man?"

"No we're still looking. We haven't found him anywhere Ang. Are you sure you just didn't miss his call?"

The drag queen went from depressed to angry immediately at his words. "MISS HIS CALL? LISTEN TO YOURSELF MARK! DOES THAT SOUND LOGICAL TO YOU! WHY WOULD HE SPEND THE NIGHT AT THE GOD DAMN COLLEGE!"

Mark stood at the phone booth in silence.

"GET OFF THE DAMN PHONE AND FIND MY BOYFRIEND!"

When Mimi came over to her best friend, she cautiously set down the hot mug and placed her hand on Angel's lower back. "Chica, calm down baby. Have some hot chocolate."

"I love him so much Mimi. How the hell did I live without him?" Angel said in a daze still holding the receiver. It was now 2:30am and still no Collins.

About an hour had passed and Roger was ready to give up. "Maybe he's cheating on Angel man." He snorted.

Mark gave him a scowl for trying to be funny. "Roger this is not the time to be laughing. Something could really be happening to Tom…or something has happened." Angel's mood was beginning to rub off on him, where the hell was Collins?

"Seriously though Mark, it's 3:30 in the morning. Let's get some sleep and try again in the morning." Roger said as he eyed some skinheads that were hanging out on the corner.

The film maker saw the same group and quickly walked with Roger back to the loft.

Mimi had fallen asleep on the couch, while Angel just sat at the kitchen table. There was no reason for her to sleep anymore. Licking her chapped lips Angel walked towards the bathroom quietly shutting the door and sat on the edge of the bathtub. She looked up at a Collins' toothbrush, placed her head in her hands and wept. Her body shook violently from the sobs, not being able to control them any longer. She was afraid, worried and in love. A combination of emotions that can be very harmful to the person experiencing them.

She took a deep breath and walked out of the bathroom, her eyes red and weak with hurt. "Mimi-Chica, get up honey."

Mimi stirred. "What's wrong Chica?"

"Let me put you to bed."

After placing Mimi into the bed that Collins and her shared, Angel walked over to the couch determined to wait until Collins got home. She was past angry, she was past worried, she just wanted him back. She wanted to feel his breath on the back of her neck when he would read to her, she wanted to feel his strong arms enveloping her in an embrace. Dammit, she just wanted him to be okay.

"3:45am." She said to herself. "I'll wait for you baby, I just wish you would come home."


	3. At A Loss

**Author's Notes: Another chapter for my dears! **

**I OWN NOTHING.**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

_**Italics are thoughts.**_

Chapter Three

Angel watched as the lock unlatched itself slowly, a shuffling noise heard outside. She did nothing to help the process along, she just watched. The door slowly opened to reveal Collins' tall frame, illuminated by the cheap hallway light. Angel still did nothing, but continued to watch her lover as he stumbled into the room and closed the door loudly.

Throwing the keys down on the floor, Collins slid down the door and landed on his behind, crying. He cried and he cried, a broken man. Angel realized that he was crying and reached over to the remaining lamp, turning it on. The light startled Collins as he looked up at Angel who was sitting on the couch, a blank look plastered onto her face.

"Tom." Was all she said to him before he crawled over to her, laying his head in her lap. She rubbed the back of his lovingly as he continued to weep into her lap.

He sobbed into Angel's lap, clenching her pajama pants with his scarred fists. "Oh Angel…"

"What's the matter lover?"

When he heard her, he cried harder, his body shaking with uncontrolled sobs. "She's gone Ang, she's gone."

Ever the caring and loving person, Angel lifted his head so their eyes met. "Who is gone Tom?"

"Gran." Collins said as tears poured down his dark face.

"I don't understand honey, you said she was doing fine. Are you sure? Have you seen her?"

The professor nodded into Angel's lap as he began to sob once again. "I saw her Angel. She's gone, she's gone."

Collins' grandmother, whom he either called 'Granny' or 'Gran' had been sick for a about a month now and Collins would go visit her everyday after work. She practically raised him, teaching him everything, and besides Angel she was his world. It wasn't until Collins' uncle called him to tell him that he was taking Gran to the hospital that Collins began to become worried about Gran's health. She was the opitomy of strength having gone through a triple bypass surgery, losing a child three years after and recently having a stroke. He knew she had been upset about a lot of things going on with the family, but little did he know that it would eventually take her life.

"Is that where you were?" Angel asked quietly as Collins continued to cry aloud.

Nodding again into Angel's lap, the drag queen needed no other explanation. Her man would never lie to her. "How do I live without her Ang? Oh my God what the hell do I do?"

She leaned down to kiss her boyfriend's head, taking in the scent of his hair as she did. "We'll figure something out sweetheart, we're in this together okay. I'll be right here with you. Don't take this alone."

Collins lifted his head up and held out his hand to caress Angel's soft cheek. He pulled her into him and kissed her, falling apart again. "I'll kill them Angel. I swear to God I'll kill them."

"Who honey?" Angel tried to stay as calm as possible because is she blew up at Collins for not calling or being there when he said he was it would put a huge strain on each of them. Collins didn't need it right now, and Angel didn't want to be the one to put anymore pressure that what already had.

"Aunt Doris and Uncle David."

His father's siblings. They had moved in with his elderly grandmother earlier that year, causing a lot of trouble that Gran never wanted anyone to know about. Collins didn't like it one bit, but he also knew that Gran would never put any of her children out if they needed a place to stay. Collins would have understood if his Aunt and Uncle had actually tried to make an effort to help Gran out, but these people didn't even have jobs. Trying to ignore the fact that they were completely crowding Gran, Collins tried to act civil with them when he went to visit his grandmother. The last straw for Collins was when his Uncle David had brought a woman into her house, a woman that wasn't involved with the best things. Hints of drugs and running from the law from his closest cousin Alan, deeply worried Collins. Why would they want to bring that world into their mother's after all she'd done for them?

"Would Gran want you to do this Tom?" Angel asked wiping the tears that had fallen on Collins' neck.

Lifting his head up slowly, Collins began to regain his composure. He sighed heavily, his breath wavering. "No, she wouldn't. I just wish…I just wish that they would think about what they do when they do things. It just doesn't affect them, it affects all of us. Even if I don't talk to them, their shit still follows me."

Angel looked at her man, she'd never seen him like this. Then again, how many times can you loose a grandmother that meant everything and anything to you?

"And now she's gone."

"Honey, she loved you…she still loves you. She'll be with you with every step you take."

Collins looked up at Angel, a faint smile coming upon his face. "What would I do without you?"

"I was beginning to wonder that when you didn't show up for half the night." Angel said laying back on the couch. "Tom, I was worried sick."

Placing his hands on Angel's thighs, Collins noticed how red and swollen Angel's eyes were. "Oh God baby, I'm so sorry. I was just so…"

Angel raised her hand in protest. "No, I understand. I was really upset, but I'm okay now you're here." As Angel thought about what she had been through the past few hours, a tear fell down her cheek. "I thought I'd lost you forever. I even sent Mark and Roger out to find you."

The professor caressed Angel's cheek. "You'll never loose me Ang, I love you."

Faking a smile, Angel pointed toward the phone. "Better call Roger and Mark, they were worried too."

For some reason Angel still wanted to yell at Collins for leaving her alone and to panic. Her thoughts went back and forth, forgive or don't forgive. Yell or don't yell.

"What the hell happened to the lamp?" Collins said picking up pieces of glass on the floor. He looked over to Angel, who had her arms crossed, pissed. After Angel didn't answer, he walked over to Angel standing above her. "Babe, what happened to the lamp?"

"I was pissed that you didn't call."

Collins looked at his lover, surely she wasn't getting mad at him for not calling. "Ang, you know where I was."

Feeling the tension rise between them Angel grabbed her knees pressing them against her chest. "Yeah I know that now, but I told you I was worried. I got pissed and threw it."

"Just like that you throw things and not care about what happens to them?"

Angel placed her fist up to her mouth, feeling herself grow angry by the second. "At the moment, I really don't Tom. You know how I get when I get angry."

The professor backed away from Angel slightly, sensing that she was going to blow up at him. "Apparently I don't know how you get Angel. How do you get?" Didn't she understand? His grandmother died, Angel Dumott Schunard the angel of love herself didn't understand that.

"Tom, don't push me."

"No one is pushing you. I'm trying to find out who the hell you are because apparently I don't know you."

Angel threw her legs down on the floor. "Tom, you're here and you're okay to a point…that's all I care about alright? Just drop it."

Collins watched Angel as she walked over to the sink to get a glass of water. "So what do I do about the lamp that _you_ broke?"

The drag queen slammed her hand on the counter with a loud slap. "Throw it away God dammit!"

Walking over to the trashcan that sat beside Angel, Collins eyed her. Where was all of this anger coming from? "Excuse me." He said sarcastically, accidentally hitting Angel on the leg in the process.

"Don't hit me Tom." Angel said looking at him as he slowly came up. He was bigger than she was, but she had fought off her uncles who were 20 times bigger than Tom.

"No one is hitting you Angel, calm down." Collins said completely fed up. He was tired and he had to be at the funeral home in the morning.

After cleaning up the pieces, the professor walked toward the bedroom leaving Angel in the living room to stew in her anger. "I'm goin' to bed. I'll see you tomorrow. I've got to be at the funeral home tomorrow morning…or should I say a few hours."

"Are you not going to call again? Am I going to have to cry for you again?"

_So she was crying._

"I'd like for you to go with me if you like, but I understand if you're too pissed to support me when I need you the most."

Just as he was about to go into the bedroom, Angel sprang up her fists clenched. "I am supporting you Tom! Don't fucking say that."

Collins had had enough, they could argue tomorrow. "Goodnight Angel, I love you." He said turning into the bedroom.

"Ah!" Mimi cried.

"Holy shit! Mimi?"

The dancer immediately got up, fixing her shirt which was falling off of her. "I came to stay with Angel because she was becoming hysterical. Are you okay?"

"Thanks for staying with her Meems, let her tell you why I came home late. But she might not be able to, she's too pissed at me for not calling when she wanted me to."

Mimi walked into the living room seeing Angel fuming on the couch. "Chica, I'm going to go home now okay?"

Angel just stared out into the living room. "You know you can't go now, it's too late. Come sleep here." She said patting the couch. Mimi did just that laying her head on Angel's lap as Angel pulled the blanket she made and threw it on the dancer. Staying in the same position, Angel sat stoned face until the sunlight hit her face telling her of the coming morning.


	4. Payment

**Author's Notes: Sorry for such a short chapter, I promise I'll write some more when the time comes to me. Thanks so much for keeping up with this story. **

**I OWN NOTHING.**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

_**Italics are thoughts or in this case phone conversations...**_

**Chapter Four**

Four hours of sleep was all Collins had gotten. He had to go on four hours of sleep, and the day wouldn't be getting any easier. His body still racked with sleep, Collins' body creaked and cracked as he patted into the living room where Angel sat, a beam of sunlight right in her eyes. Mimi was completely knocked out, snoring slightly as she slept on Angel's lap.

_One of the most comfortable places on earth._

Collins faintly smiled, he'd spent many a night on Angel's lap.

"Ang?"

Angel continued to stare; she had obviously slept with her eyes open a feat all in itself.

Collins went to reach for his lover and immediately she swatted his hand away. "I'm not asleep. I was afraid you'd leave again."

The professor looked at Angel, it was 6 in the morning and he knew that when Angel saw the size of those bags underneath her eyes, all hell would brake loose.

"Okay Ang." He said placing a light kiss on her cheek. "You hungry?"

"No, I'm not fucking hungry." She said bitterly, which made Mimi stir.

As Collins took out a bowl for cereal, he sighed. "Okay Ang."

"Stop fucking saying that."

"Angel please don't start babe. I've got to go view my grandmother's body in two hours and I'd appreciate it if you just give me a break until AFTER." Collins said as he poured some milk into his bowl. How long was she going to be mad at him?

When the professor had sat down, he grabbed the funeral home pamphlets that the hospital had given him. "I can't believe that I have to do this on my own. No one else will do it."

Angel knew she should be comforting her man right now, but could get herself to let go of the fact that she had almost had a panic attack about him not calling.

"It's just after all these years; they talk about me behind my back and try to exclude me from the family. Now they want me to take care of Granny's funeral plans. With what fucking money?" Collins rubbed his head, exhausted and overwhelmed.

"I'd have to go to her house to find the papers. I remember her saying that she had all of this planned out already, I just don't have the money to…God dammit." When Collins began weeping into his cereal, Angel looked down at the sleeping Mimi. She wanted to shove Mimi out of the way, run over to Collins and hold him tight, but her bitterness held her even as it pained her.

Collins realized that Angel wasn't coming to his aid and he looked over toward her in between his sobs. "Angel, don't you care?" He felt like a child wanting love from a mother that was reluctant to give it to him. "Angel?"

"What?" Angel said coldy.

"I…I could really use your support baby." Collins said wiping his eyes.

"I could have too…"

"Is this about last night! My grandmother died Angel how do you expect me to act!"

Tempers began to rise again, and Angel moved Mimi from her lap. The dancer didn't even stir, that girl could sleep through anything. "Tom, I love you. But I asked you to call me when you were going to be late. I was so worried-"

"I knew you would be worried Angel, I just couldn't think right at the time…I just….I don't know Angel, I don't have one damn clue."

Letting her bitterness melt around her, Angel reached for Collins as he sobbed into her chest. "It's okay baby, you'll be fine. I'm right here."

"She's gone Angel, she really is gone."

It wasn't until the phone began to ring that Mimi actually woke up. "What's wrong Collins?" She said sleepily.

"Nothing Mimi." Angel said holding a crying Collins.

The dancer turned toward Angel. "Is it nothing Mimi I don't want you to know or nothing Mimi he's just pmsing?"

"Mimi please."

"Fine, since you seem to be Collins' only friend I'm going to go home." Mimi said as she grabbed her jacket from the bedroom. "Feel better Collins we love you. Answer the phone."

Angel glared at her best friend and looked down at Collins. "Tom, I need to answer the phone."

"The phone?" Collins sprang up, his eyes red. The tall man ran over to the phone and picked it up quickly. "Hello?"

"_May I speak to Tom Collins please?"_

"This is he."

"_Hi Mr. Collins, this is the coroner's office and I wanted to make sure that you would be able to be down here-"_

"Yeah, I can. I'll be there as soon as I can."

"_Okay, because one of the things that we'll need to discuss is payment."_

The professor rubbed his face roughly. "Of course. Thank you so much for calling."

After hanging up, Collins looked up at the ceiling trying to find a way to pay for everything. If indeed Gran paid for everything already, all he would have to do was get a dress and pay the coroner.

"How the hell am I going to pay for this?"

Angel looked up from the kitchen table. "Doesn't a little bulldog owe you some pretty big favors?"


	5. Old Friends

**Author's Notes: I wanted to apologize to you, my readers for not updating sooner. I've been extremely busy with work and school, and I just haven't had the time to actually sit down and write. Today is my day…my only day. Expect another update early next week (maybe even Monday). **

**I OWN NOTHING.**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

**_Italics are thoughts..._**

**Chapter Five**

The steering wheel showed Benny just how nervous he was as he drove over to Collins and Angel's apartment. Grabbing a napkin from the glove compartment, the man began to wipe the steering wheel that was covered in his sweat. Collins sounded really upset on the phone and he knew that he had to help in some kind of way, I mean after all the shit he put Mark and Roger through he knew he owed them something. It never did occur to Benny that if he had done something for _Mark_ or _Roger_ it might ease their hatred against them. But Collins was as close as he was going to get to the guys and he knew it. As he was stopped at a stoplight Benny looked out the window of his Range Rover remembering the good times he had, how the guys really brought him alive after he left his parent's prison of a house. Now he was dead again. Back to that old shit of not being who he was, of not living. One more block to go and Collins' familiar building came into view. He stepped out of his car, making sure the windows were up and the doors were locked, and took one last look in the mirror.

Traveling up the stairs Benny thought about what he had done to the group and how much it has changed since he left. It was quite apparent to him that Angel was holding them all together, which had to be tiring. They depended on her for everything, and what made it even more saddening was that Angel was barely holding onto life herself. Taking in a deep breath, Benny knocked on the door not knowing what to expect since Collins wouldn't relay any details to him.

"Who is it?" Came Angel's muffled voice.

The man cleared his throat nervously; even Angel's voice had a way of sending shivers up his spine. "Benny."

He heard locks being unlocked quickly and as the door opened Angel's tall form stood in the doorway. She looked stressed and exhausted; he immediately saw the disease taking a toll on her. "Hi Benny. Thank you for coming."

"Hey Angel. Good to see you." He spat out as she gestured him in.

"Tom is in the room, he'll be right out." Angel said as she grabbed her drumsticks and pickle tub. "Tom I'm going to do some drumming!"

"Alright." Collins answered back tiredly. When the street drummer got her response she weakly smiled at Benny and closed the front door behind her.

The man looked around the apartment; it definitely had both of their personalities written all over the apartment. Collins' philosophy books sat on one side of a shelf and Angel's colorful cup of fabric scissors were on the other. The two were complete opposites, but they fit together like a hand in a glove.

"Hey man, thanks for coming." Collins said as he wiped his face with a small washcloth.

Benny turned around on the couch to see his old friend. "That's alright man, are you alright? You didn't sound too good on the phone."

Collins plopped himself in the old lazy boy chair, the cloth lying in his lap. "Gran died last night man."

"What!" Benny was genuinely upset, which sort of threw Collins off a bit. He'd known Gran for a good while and she was always in the best of health when he saw her. But when was the last time he saw Gran? A few years ago. Benny felt like an asshole for not keeping up with Collins' family, he was like a brother. "God man I am so sorry."

"That's where I was all night."

"Jesus." Benny said rubbing his face. "I can't believe this."

"Yeah, you and me both." Collins said as he looked out into the small living room of the apartment.

"How are you going to pay for this?"

"That's why I asked you over." That is one thing Benny could depend on, Collins' honesty.

"I see. How much were they thinking?"

Collins began to wipe his face again. "I don't know. I've got an appointment with them in about an hour to go over all of that."

"Well I'd be happy to help you man." Benny said walking over to his friend and placing his hand on his back.

The professor stood up and grabbed Benny into a tight embrace. "Thank you man. Thank you so much."

Benny patted Collins' back as he hugged him. "I owe you a shit load more than this. Don't worry about it."

"I just…don't know what to do man. Me and Angel…we…I don't know." Collins said as tears began to fall again.

"Shh. Don't worry about it man. One thing at a time." This was the old Benny, the caring and compassionate Benny. Collins' friend Benny. Was he still there? "We'll deal with Angel later, but right now the priority is Gran."

Collins wiped his face with his shoulder, nodding. "You're right man, I know."

"Come on; let's get out of here so you won't be late."

"Alright let me write Angel a note."

_Ang – _

_Benny is taking me to the morgue. I'll be home later. Don't stay alone. Go over to Mimi's or Joanne's. We'll talk when I get back. _

_I love you._

_Tom_

After a couple of hours of good drumming, Angel felt revived and anew. She even made about $20 which she was definitely happy about. Angel placed her drumsticks inside her pickle tub, and looked around the empty apartment. Figuring she'd better shower and take a small nap, Angel looked up to see a note hanging from the top of the door frame. She smiled when she saw in that odd but extremely clever place; Collins amazed her with something everyday. Standing on her tiptoes, she grabbed the note and read it carefully.

"Don't stay alone." She muttered to herself. "I'm taking a nap Thomas."

As she stepped into the shower, Angel began to think about the way she acted to her man in his greatest time of need. She weighed her responses and figured she was right. He didn't call. He didn't apologize. He didn't even consider her feelings. She wasn't selfish. She was just so worried. She loved him with all of her heart and just didn't want to lose him. In the letter he wrote he said that he loved her, but if she kept up her attitude was she going to lose him? He would never leave her. Would he? No. He loved her.

After brushing her teeth and giving herself a nice facial, Angel wrapped herself in her terry cloth housecoat Maureen had bought her a few weeks ago. The cloth felt soft and gave her comfort as she brushed it against her cheek. Padding out of the bathroom and into the bedroom, Angel climbed onto Collins' side of the bed wanting to smell his scent, as it gave her comfort. Inhaling his scent with each breath, the street drummer fell into a deep sleep as the noises of Alphabet City sang into her ears.


	6. Good Ol' Benny

**Author's Notes: YAY! I'm back! I'm so glad to be back! Sorry for taking so dang long to update you guys, hope you forgive me! Here's another chapter that I hope you enjoy!**

**I OWN NOTHING (only this story and the add-ons).**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

**Chapter Six**

Collins and Benny entered into the coroner's office watching people walk by with tissues in their hands and other family members on their arms. Collins was upset that he was alone in this. Didn't anyone care about Gran? Didn't she mean the world to them like she did to him? Collins never could understand why his family did what they did, one of the questions he figured he'd ask God when…and if he got there.

"Hello and welcome." A voice came from behind them. "My name is Milana, who are you here to see?"

"Mr. Ferrer." Benny said for Collins who was too shaken up to answer.

The woman eyed Collins' body language sensing he was of the bereaved. "Right this way."

The two men followed the tall woman along a long corridor decorated nicely, but also had a sort of creepy feeling to it. Lots of chandeliers, too many chandeliers. "Who shall I say is here to see him?" The woman said with a too eerie smile on her face, the poor thing must look death in the face everyday of her life.

"Tom Collins." The professor said, his voice wavering just a bit.

"Have a seat gentleman and he'll be right with you. Feel free to partake in some coffee and pastries."

"I'm going to get you some coffee man. How do you take it?"

Collins held his face in his hands. "Black man. Don't put a damn thing in it."

"Sounds good to me." After seating himself, Benny handed the steaming hot cup to Collins who took a large gulp of it.

Benny rubbed his friend's back. "We'll get through this man, don't worry."

"You must be Mr. Collins." Said an older man around 50 who reached out for Collins and Benny's hand.

Collins' head sprang up. "Yes, that's me." Shaking his hand the man seated them once again. "This is my friend Benny Coffin." How ironic is Benny's last name?

"Nice to meet you Benny." The man said placing his glasses on his nose. "Alright, you're here to take of your Grandmother Ann Collins."

"Yes." Collins said slowly.

"As you know we have her here, and what we need from you is a funeral home in where to place her and a form of payment."

"We have your money. But I don't have the papers that tell me where she wants to be placed. I haven't had the chance to get down there yet."

"I see. Well we can only keep her for a week, so I would suggest getting down ASAP."

Benny looked at this man; surely he wasn't being as heartless as he was right now. "You know what, keep Gran for a week we'll get the papers you need. How much is it so we can get her the hell out of here."

Collins couldn't believe that this was Benny that he was witnessing. It felt good to have his old friend back.

"Collins go wait in the car, I'll take care of it. We'll be back in a week or sooner to get Gran."

Taking that as his cue, the tall professor walked out of the office closing the door behind him. He spotted a phone booth and fumbled around his pockets for some change to call Angel with. Her voice would be all she needed to help him keep going.

He quickly dialed the number and counted each ring until he heard her voice.

"_Hello?" _Came Angel's groggy voice. To Collins, it sounded as smooth as velvet.

"Hi baby girl." He was on the verge of crying.

"_Tom? Hi lover, where are you?" _

"I'm at the coroner's office with Benny. They're giving me a week before they'll throw Gran out on the street." Okay, yes he was exaggerating but he didn't care.

"_Oh my God! Are you serious!" _Maybe exaggerating wasn't the best idea; he almost forgot how sensitive Angel was. _"What do you need me to do baby? Just tell me!"_

"I need you to go with me and Benny to go to Gran's house."

"_Of course I'll go sweetie, but isn't your family going to be there? Will they want me around?"_

"I don't give a shit Angel. You're my life, and I need you there."

"_Calm down my love, I'll go I'll go okay? Come home, I miss you."_

"I miss you too. Oh, here comes Benny. I'll be home soon babe okay? I love you."

"_I love you too much."  
_

Talking to Angel did make him feel better as he expected, and that gave him a boost of energy he didn't know he possessed. Running over to Benny, the two men climbed into the car.

"So how much was it?"

Benny looked out the window, never taking his eyes off of the street. "Don't worry about it man. But I think he charged me more-"

"Because he knew you had money." Collins answered for him.

"Yeah, but that's with everything for me." Benny chuckled. "Let me get you and Angel something to eat before I drop you off."

After Benny picked Angel and Collins up some of the best Soul Food on the east coast, he started on his way to Alphabet City.

As Collins climbed out of the Range Rover food clutched closely to his chest, Benny leaned in towards him. "I'll give you a call tomorrow so we can set up our trip down there alright?"

"Thanks so much Benny."

"See you later." And with a quick punch on the gas, the Range Rover disappeared around the corner.

Collins was actually surprised that he made it into the apartment untouched, seeing as the food's aroma could be smelled a mile down. Angel answered the door quickly opening it. "Oh baby! That smells wonderful! What is it?"

"This…my Angel…is Soul Food."

"Mmm sounds good! What is Soul Food.?" Angel said as she took the bags from him and placed them on the kitchen table.

"Stuff that Gran used to cook; it's pretty close to it so I figured I let you taste a bit of heaven."

As Angel happily ate, she remembered the trip she'd have to take soon. "So where is Gran's house?"

"In Maryland. Bowie, Maryland."


	7. Getting Things In Order

**Author's Notes: Another chapter for my dears! Thanks so much for keeping up with my stories, I really appreciate it. **

**I OWN NOTHING (but this story & add-ons).**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

**_Italics are thoughts..._**

**Chapter Seven**

Collins knew that the group wasn't going to like the fact that Benny would be involved with this whole ordeal, but they also knew that it was good to have money…or at least know someone who has a lot of it and that owes you.

"Listen up guys. I really want you to lay off Benny, he's being…a friend for once."

Angel watched her man as she crossed her legs still a little bitter about the night before. Mimi felt terribly uncomfortable when Collins announced to the group that Benny would be over in just a minute, she even though about playing sick and running down to her loft.

"So you want us to go with you down to Maryland?" Joanne asked with her lawyer face on.

"Yes Jo, I want you all to come with me. I need you all there with me."

Maureen shifted herself in Joanne's lap. "We love you Collins, but Benny?"

"Yes Benny Maureen. If some of you don't want to go, I'll understand."

"No, we'll go. We'll all go, whether we like it or not." Mark said as he stood to give a Collins a hug. "We're here for you."

Collins smiled at his old friend. "None of you have to say a word to him, all I ask of you is to come with me, and help me find the bullshit I need. Maybe even fight off some of my homophobic relatives and we can come home."

Roger's eyes lit up like a small child in a toy store. "Ass kicking homophobes? My idea of a good ass time!"

When the phone ran everyone in the loft went into an eerie silence, Collins shook his head and picked up the phone. "He's here, now please everyone just act rationally. Mo please."

"Alright, alright. I promise Collins." Running over to the fire escape, Collins threw down the key to Benny who quickly jogged inside the building.

As soon as Mimi saw him, their eyes locked which was exactly what Roger was waiting on. "Come on babe; let's go to your place." Practically picking Mimi up, Roger made sure he was some good feet away from Benny as he walked downstairs toward Mimi's loft.

"Hey man." Collins greeted the younger man with a warm hug. "Hey Collins." Tipping his head to Angel, Benny and Collins walked over to the metal table and began to talk about the trip to come.

"So who is going to be in the car with me? Because I don't want any trouble-"

"Its okay man, Angel and I will be in the car with you."

"Me too." Mark said rubbing a cloth on the lens of his camera. "I'll be with you guys too."

Collins turned toward the lawyer who was currently playing with Maureen's hair. "Jo, you're going to take your car right?"

"I'm actually going to rent an SUV for the trip, but we're fine Collins don't worry. It should be interesting with Roger Davis and Maureen Johnson in the same car."

Benny looked around the old loft; he hadn't been here in ages. "Sounds good, so when do you want to leave man?"

"I'd like to leave tomorrow." Collins said rubbing his chin.

Maureen leaned off of Joanne's lap trying to get better seated. "How long are we going to be there Collins?"

"It shouldn't take to long Mo, maybe a couple of days."

Joanne gently patted Maureen's behind so she'd get up which Maureen did. "I'm actually going to need another 24 hours to let my firm know I'll be gone for a few days can we leave Friday?"

"Yeah, it'll give us time to pack and get things in order." Mark said eyeing Angel who hadn't moved since they had arrived.

"Friday it is, I'll be in touch with everyone about where to meet and what time. It's going too early in the morning so we can get there at a decent time alright guys?"

Everyone except Angel nodded in agreement which made Collins feel a little uneasy, but he wasn't about to call her out in front of everyone. "I better get going. I'll see you later Collins." Benny said giving his friend a quick hug and practically running out of the loft.

"Should be pretty fun, a road trip with good friends." Collins said as he held Angel tightly by the waist as they made their way home.

"Yep, should be a lot of fun indeed."

"What's the matter Ang? I don't understand why you're still mad at me? I'm fine, I'm here. I love you and I don't want us to fight anymore, I need you."

Angel looked down at the ground as the two walked. "I know, I'm sorry honey, I'm just a little stubborn is all. I am here for you though. I love you too. But I was just thinking, maybe I should stay here."

Collins stopped in his tracks. "Are you serious Angel? I'm not leaving you here by yourself. No, please don't even go there."

"But all I'll do is get people even more mad at me than they seem to be, I'll just be in the way."

"No Angel, you're going and I don't care what you say. I'll drag you!" And with this he picked Angel up and lugged her over his shoulder as she squealed all the way down the block.

"Fine! I'll go, I'll go!"

"That's what I thought; now get upstairs before I take it upon myself to tickle you to death." Collins said giving her his best evil laugh.

"You wouldn't dare."

Smirking, Collins replied. "You'd better start running then."


	8. The Road Trip

**Authors' Notes: Another chapter before dinner! Mmm Porkchops! Okay, anyway here's another one. I had fun writing this one. Thanks to all of you that review, I really appreciate it.**

**I OWN NOTHING (but this story & add-ons).**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

**Chapter Eight**

Today was the day, the day of the big trip. Joanne's mom felt nice so she leant her suitcases to the group, but it came that only the girls really needed them seeing as they brought all of their clothes with them. Collins looked at his old watch which was cracked from that night he was mugged. Idiots didn't even bother checking his arm for his watch. "Ready Miss Angel?"

"Yes lover I'm ready." Angel said as she came out of the bedroom with her long blonde wig, short jean skirt, tight black collared shirt, her black platforms and a beautiful black straw hat.

"Wow." Was all her man could say as she picked up her backpack and jacket.

"I'm glad you like it." She said smirking at him. "Is Benny here?"

Just as Benny was about to answer, he heard Benny beeping his car horn downstairs. "Let's go girl." Collins said as he picked up their bags with Angel right behind.

When they reached the car, Mark was already in the back seat with the window filming them.

"For God's sake Markie. Turn off the damn camera." Angel said as she got into the car.

"Woah! No bad language in this car or you'll be put into Maureen's." Benny said chuckling.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." Collins said as he leaned into the car to kiss Angel before getting into the front seat.

Benny rolled his eyes. "Anarchists."

"You sure you don't want to be in the back Collins?" Mark asked as he watched Angel putting on black eyeliner.

Collins turned around in his seat to get Angel's attention. "You good babe?"

The drag queen stopped for a moment. "I'm good lover."

"No, we're good." Collins answered as he turned back into his seat.

Both Benny and Mark chuckled together for the first time in ages, but it felt good. "That's quite obvious Thomas."

When the Range Rover came into view on the block of the loft, Maureen and Joanne were already waiting in the car. Collins jumped out of the car to greet the girls but found they couldn't hear anything because of how loud Maureen was the music. "Cut the music down Maureen!" Joanne screamed at the top of her lungs.

After Maureen had gotten the hint, she lowered the window down giving Collins a quick kiss. "You girls ready to go?"

"Yeah, we've been ready. We're waiting for Mimi and Roger."

"They're probably upstairs fucking." Maureen said as she shaped her nails with a nail file.

As if on cue, Roger and Mimi came downstairs with their bags and somehow managed to make-out at the same time. "That must be some kind of science doing that."

"No, it's actually kind of easy."

Joanne glared at her girlfriend. "_We've_ never tried that."

Collins knew where this was going so he decided to go back into the car before he was caught in something he didn't have time for. "Hey guys, stop fucking for a second and wave."

Mimi waved as Roger maneuvered the door open.

"Oh yeah, here's Benny's cell number in case you want to stop somewhere or something."

"Will do Collins. We'll be following you anyway, but we'll let you know."

When Collins finally got into the car, Angel was already sleeping, her hat covering her face just a bit like an old man underneath a sombrero.

Benny looked into the review mirror. "Damn, Angel falls asleep in a minute."

Collins looked into the side mirror. "Yep. She'll sleep anywhere if you let her."

"I hope you don't do anything that would make her _want_ to fall asleep Tom."

The professor punched Benny on the arm. "No, you must be mistaking me and Ang for you and Allison."

And with that they were off.

The group traveled through New Jersey and was going well into Delaware before anyone had to eat or go to the bathroom. Angel missed Collins so she made Benny pull over so he could get in the back. The trip was going off without a hitch and Collins was wondering when someone would freak out.

"Look Collins! Isn't it beautiful?"

Collins took his gaze from his girl to admire the landscape of Delaware, nothing but trees. "It's only trees Ang."

"Yeah, but how many tall trees like this do yo see in New York?"

Kissing his girl on the temple, Collins tightened his grip around her. "Are you hungry Ang? Do you have to go to the bathroom or anything?"

Angel kissed Collins' nose, her red lipstick staining his nose a bit. "Actually, I'd love to get something to eat."

"Mark, call Joanne and tell her to go over to the nearest rest station Angel is hungry!"

Immediately Angel was embarrassed. "Oh my goodness Thomas, I'll be fine. Don't make such a big deal."

"No, you're hungry so I'm going to make sure you get something to eat."

Shaking her head in embarrassment, Angel dug into her purse to find something to do.

"It's okay Angel. Everyone in the other car is hungry. We'll stop for lunch."

"Thanks Markie."

When the gang reached a place they could all agree on, the Cracker Barrel, Collins erupted in laughter. "Oh man! I remember coming to this place!"

The name alone made Benny nervous. "Collins, are we going to be lynched or something?"

"No man! We're good. Some of the nicest people work at the Cracker Barrel."

As they gang stretched their tired legs, Angel looked around nervously. "Honey, maybe you guys should bring me something to eat. They might not lynch black people, but they might lynch drag queens."

Collins looked at his girl concerned. "Come on babe, you'll be fine. They'll lynch Maureen and Joanne before you." And with this Collins laughed once more.

When he noticed Angel's expression going from concerned to frightened, he hugged Angel to give her comfort. "I'll be right here with you. Don't worry."

The restaurant was lined with rocking chairs which Roger had found to be a very comfortable place to play his guitar.

"I can't believe you brought that thing along Roger." Collins said hand in hand with Angel.

Maureen flipped her hair as she pulled Joanne who was texting her father, along behind her. "Please, you think he'd leave that thing? It's like his penis."


	9. The Cracker Barrel

**Author's Notes: Another chapter! Yay! Thanks for keeping up with this story and reviewing I really appreciate it! Have a great week!**

**I OWN NOTHING (but this story and add-ons).**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

**Chapter Nine**

The group minus Roger walked into the Cracker Barrel completely taken aback with everything around them. The room was filled with nicknacks of all kinds which enticed Angel but she still held on close to her man, afraid of what was to happen to her if she ever let him go.

"It's alright Ang." Collins whispered into her ear.

She gave her lover a weak smile and looked around for the exits. If anything was to happen she'd be the first out, heels and all.

At a podium stood a girl no more than Mimi's age with a full apron. "Hey guys, welcome to the Cracker Barrel."

Joanne walked up to the girl smiling. "Thanks."

"How many?"

"8. Party of Joanne."

Maureen frowned at this. "Why does it have to be party of Joanne?"

Everyone knows the signs of a coming argument but everyone usually stayed out of it until it got really out of hand. Angel on the other hand, didn't want to hear anything of it. "Ladies."

Immediately the two turned away from one another, walking out of the restaurant as if they had been scolded by their mother.

"Okay, it'll be about ten minutes we need to get the tables and things in order for you." And with the girl was off.

"It'll be ten minutes guys." Mark said as she walked back to the group.

"Let's go outside and wait. It's nice out." Angel said as she quickly dragged Collins behind her.

"Mark, now would be a good time to take a picture." Roger said sarcastically as he continued to strum out some songs.

As if on cue, Mark took out his old Polaroid and brought it to his eye. "Come on everyone, get in the picture."

"Let's do a naughty one!" Maureen yelled at the top of her lungs causing the old people to stare.

As everyone began to assemble, Roger didn't move an inch. "Umm Roger, can't you get up or something?" Collins asked trying to get situated.

The rocked held his position with his guitar. "Nope."

Collins slapped Roger in the back of the head. "Asshole."

"What the hell was that for!" Roger whined trying to put his hair back in it's place.

Angel leaned over pressing Roger's cheeks together. "For being an asshole honey."

"I have an idea." Collins whispered into Angel's ear. Quickly lifting Mimi with ease, the professor sat down on Roger's lap. "Collins! What the fuck man!"

Angel followed her lover holding onto her hat as she plopped herself on top of her lover. "Oh my God Angel!"

The drag queen smirked. "That's what they say baby!" Collins blushed heavily at this.

Maureen stomped her foot on the ground. "I want to do it too!" So she sat on Angel's lap while the rocking chair that they were sitting on began to creak. "Pookie! Come on!"

Joanne gave them all a look, rolling her eyes. "You're out of your mind."

"Get your tight ass over here Jefferson!" Collins screamed at her. Sighing heavily Joanne climbed onto the mound of bohemians, while everyone began to laugh at how heavy things were becoming. "I'm not fat!"

"No one said you were fat Pookie it's okay." Maureen squealed.

"Yay! I'm on top!" Mimi cried out to them.

Angel laughed loudly at Mimi's comment. "Yeah, she likes it on top!"

"Shut-up Angel!"

"No really, she does." Roger said chuckling under his breath.

"Fuck you Roger!"

"I know we will babe."

Mimi walked on the side of the group and slapped Roger in the back of the head before climbing on top of Maureen.

"Oh my God you guys, the rocking chair is starting to break." Joanne said as she heard the chair continue to creak.

"Mark! Come on!" Mimi said waving to the film maker.

"Who's going to take the picture!"

"Her!" Mimi pointed to the seating hostess who was giggling happily.

"Please?" Mark said smiling at the attractive girl.

"Of course, and by the way your table is ready."

Mark ran to the group. "Great!"

"Hold still guys!" The young woman said holding the camera up to her eye. "Say cheese!"

"Wait!" Collins yelled causing Angel to grab one of her ears. "Sorry babe." Collins said sheepishly.

"What is it Thomas!" Roger yelled. "I can't feel my fucking legs anymore."

"Potty mouth." Angel said putting her finger to her lips to shush him.

"Where's Benny?"

Maureen adjusted herself on Joanne. "Who cares?"

"Benny! Get the hell over here dumb ass!" Collins yelled to the man who felt a little out of place.

Benny shook his head, weakly smiling. "No you guys go ahead."

Roger really couldn't feel anything anymore. "Get the fuck over here Benny before I kick your ass!"

Following his orders, the businessman walked behind the group onto another rocking chair causing him to tower over them all. "Go!"

"Say cheese!"

"CHEESE!" The group yelled.

Angel and Collins had to help Roger to his seat because the feeling hadn't yet come back in. They were seated onto a homely looking patio. "This is so beautiful." Angel whispered to her lover who smiled warmly at her.

The table had country charm which Angel definitely took a liking to. "Let's sit!"

After everyone had situated themselves, the seating hostess walked over to Mark handing her his camera. "I think you forgot this."

Mark blushed, he never forgot his camera. "Oh, th-thank you so much."

"You're welcome. Enjoy your meal." And as she looked to see his friends occupied with themselves, slipped him a small piece of paper. "I'm not a whore or anything I promise, but give me a call when you get the chance. See ya!"

The paper read:

_Sienna_

_818-555-3365_

Quicklyrealizing that everyone was looking around them, Mark shoved it into his pocket.

"You know, I think that girl likes Mark." Mimi said reading her menu. "Oh! Chicken Friend Steak, Angel what is that?"

Angel crossed her legs, eyeing her menu. "It's just what it sounds like sweetie. They put gravy on it. I heard it's really good."

"It is, it's one of my favorites." Benny said eyeing the dancer who was still just as enticing and beautiful as he could remember.

Roger looked up at Benny's words and pulled Mimi's chair next to him. "What are you gonna get Thomas?" Roger said quickly changing the subject.

"You know . . . Chicken Fried Steak sounds wonderful." Collins said rubbing Angel's leg.

After everyone had put in their orders, conversations went back to various people except for Collins and Angel.

"What's the matter lover?" Angel lowered her voice so no one would hear.

"I never thought about how hard it would be to go back to the house. How is my family going to act when they see . . . us? I don't want to put you through something that-"

Angel held her hand up to his lips. "Tom, I'm here with you. I'm not leaving you. I love you okay? Loosen up, have some fun. We'll be fine." Angel looked up to see their waiter bringing their food. "It's time to eat sweetie."

As the group happily ate, Collins didn't even begin to touch his food. The drag queen cut a piece of steak with his fork and knife and held it up to his mouth. "Tom, eat."

Collins opened his mouth and closed his eyes at the hot food entering his mouth. Finally he realized how hungry he was and took the fork from Angel. "That's what I thought." Angel giggled.

"How were we doing?" Mark looked up to see that girl, Sienna staring at the group, but mostly him.

Angel smiled. "We're fine honey. His name is Mark."

The girl blushed a bit. "Oh, is it that obvious?"

"Very." Angel chuckled. "Why don't you take him outside and have a chat huh?"

Mark looked at this girl, she was amazingly beautiful. "Markie, why don't you take pictures of the store so we'll have it as a memento." Angel asked him loudly as she continued to eat.

Mark stood up, forgetting his camera that was his scapegoat. "Sure. Would you like to join me?"

"Where the hell is Mark?" Mimi asked as she checked her hair in the mirror.

"He's outside talking to a girl." Maureen smiled. "Thank God. I was tired of seeing him alone."

Angel laid back in her chair sighing. "He wouldn't be that way if you hadn't left him girlfriend."

Suddenly feeling really uncomfortable, Maureen got up from her seat. "I'm gonna go get some air."

"She can never take anyone being truthful to her. She'd rather be lied to."

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So a film maker huh? That's really interesting Mark." Sienna said as she quietly rocked in her rocking chair.

In about ten minutes, Mark had found out a few things about this girl. She was 20, a Junior in College and a Photography major. Mark had managed to put a few sentences together to let her know how he was from New York, but it didn't seem to matter to her.

"I bet your girlfriend is waiting for you Mark, you better get going."

"I, I don't have a girlfriend." Mark said rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "Would you like to change that?"

_Where the hell did that come from? _

"Actually, I would."

As the group piled into their cars, Mark gave Sienna his number to the loft and shook her hand politely. "It was nice to meet you. I'll give you a call."

The girl smiled. "I'd like that."

"Mark! Get your pastey ass over here!" Collins yelled from the car.

Jogging over to the car, Mark peered into the back seat to find that Angel and Collins were already making out. Rolling his eyes, yet silently smiling knowing he would be doing that soon the film maker opened the door getting in watching Sienna wave at him as Benny backed the car up.


	10. Granny's Home, Granny's Heart

**Author's Notes: So, I'm home for the weekend. I had a writing bug and just couldn't stop, hope you all like it. Just FYI for you all, this story is a big part of my life, especially a lot of the little details. Only a few things are turned around. Anyway, hope everyone is having a great weekend!**

**I OWN NOTHING (only the story & add-ons).**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

_**Italics are thoughts. **_

**Chapter Ten**

The group didn't stop until they arrived at Collins' grandmother's house. The house was on a quaint street, very homey and very friendly looking. Angel awoke to the nervous squeeze of Collins' hand as he tensed, seeing Granny's house come closer and closer into view. "It's okay lover." She whispered into his ear, as she kissed him sweetly on the cheek.

Benny looked about him, trying to find a parking space. "Should I park in the driveway?"

"Yeah, that's fine." Collins replied as his palms started to sweat, Angel rubbed his arm lovingly. "It's alright sweetheart."

Mark woke as he felt the car coming to a stop. "We here?"

Benny chuckled, slapping him on the knee. "Yes Mark, we're here. Get out of the car."

Mark grabbed his camera as he got out of the car, going over to see how the rest of the girls and Roger were doing. Mimi held onto Roger who had a good grip on the dancer so she wouldn't fall.

Maureen sat on the edge of the car, as Joanne continued to text whoever the hell it was. "Who the hell do you keep texting Joanne?"

"A couple of guys from the office, they're brainstorming on our next case." She mumbled as she walked over to a very distraught Collins who was sitting inside the car, his legs hanging out of the car. Angel kneeled down trying to help as much as she could. "Is there anything I can do?"

Collins lifted his sweat ridden face, trying to give his girl the best smile he could muster. "I'll be alright; I just can't believe I'm here."

Benny had been watching Collins for a while and figured he should take the lead in the situation. "Tom, do you have the keys? I'll get us in there."

Angel looked worriedly at her man as she answered for him. "Thank you Benny." She took the keys from Collins and handed them to Benny never taking her eyes off of him.

"Roger! Get the hell over here and help me with these bags will ya!" The rocker kissed Mimi in her hair as he walked over to his ex-friend, taking two heavy bags away from Joanne's car. "What the hell is in these things Johnson?"

"I didn't know how long we were saying so I figured I should pack for a little while." Maureen said as she ran her fingers through Joanne's curly hair.

Benny took his bag as Mark and Roger followed him up the walkway. As he began to unlock the door, a woman hurriedly opened the door scaring the businessman a bit. "Ya'll here!"

"Oh God!" Benny shouted startled, dropping the bag on the floor.

At the sound of the woman's voice, Collins' weak head shot up her way. His sick face went away to pure hatred. Angel watched the change in her man, she knew for a fact that Collins never hated anyone and if he did, it was a good reason for it and they usually deserved it.

"Are you one of Tom's friends? I'm Tom's Aunt Doris." She warmly shook Benny, Roger and Mark's hand with no question, even if they didn't answer her. Roger knew the deal with Collins and his aunt so he said nothing as he loosely shook her hand.

The woman looked around the three men, staring at Maureen who was currently hugging Joanne closely. "I suppose I'll be meetin' the rest of you when you come in. I've got beds set up for everyone, come on in."

Mimi ran over to Collins and Angel, rubbing her arms for warmth. "You guys comin'?"

Angel looked pleadingly at her best friend. "We will Chica, just give us a minute."

The dancer nodded her head as she leaned in to give Collins a quick peck on the cheek before grabbing her bag and running towards the house. Joanne placed her cell phone into her pocket as she walked over to Collins, kneeling next to Angel. "You're gonna be fine Collins, we're all here. Don't worry."

Maureen blew the professor a kiss as they walked towards the house as well. Collins looked up at his friends as they entered his grandmother's house. "I really appreciate that they all came."

"They know you do sweetie, they love you and so do I." Angel took a handkerchief from her purse, wiping his brow with it. "Ready to go in? Or do you want to stay out here a little longer?"

Collins finally stood out of the car, helping Angel in the process. "I think I'll stay out here for a little while if you don't mind."

"Of course I don't lover."

"You know, my grandmother loved roses. She had a line of roses in the driveway right over – Oh God."

The drag queen eyed her lover alarmingly as he stopped mid sentence. "What is it Tom?"

Quickly, he walked over to roses that once were blooming and beautiful, but now were wilted and dead. "She didn't even bother to water the roses." Finding the whole scene so sickening, Collins walked over to a nearby bush vomiting violently.

"Tom!" Angel cried out as she ran behind him rubbing his back as he spewed all of his stomach contents into the shrub.

"What happened?" Benny asked as he jogged over to the professor who could hardly talk as he continued to throw up.

"He got sick. It's okay honey, its okay." She cooed to him as he began to lurch from the pain in his stomach. "There goes your AZT love."

The professor finally got a hold of his stomach as he slowly rose from his position. Sighing heavily, Collins almost fell back but luckily Benny caught him. "He's exhausted Angel; let's get him into the house."

The three of them made their way up to the house, Collins falling in and out on consciousness. "Oh my Lord, Tom! Are you alright?"

"He just needs a rest. Where did you put him to sleep?" Benny exclaimed as he carried a weary Collins to a nearby chair.

"Right in that room." Aunt Doris said pointing down the hall. "Very last door to the right. Tom knows where it is."

"Hi, I'm Angel." Angel said outstretching her hand to Collins' Aunt, who hesitantly made eye contact with her. She'd never been very pleased with how successful in college Collins was, but the whole gay thing upset her even more. Aunt Doris was the jealous type, always was and always will be. None of her children had ever even seen a college, not because they couldn't but because they wouldn't. Even her grandchildren didn't even stand a chance. So whenever she saw Collins or saw Granny making a nice comment about Collins, she dismissed it immediately. And Angel could smell it right away. Jealously has an awful stench.

"She's my boyfriend." Collins muttered as he slouched tiredly in his chair. If there was one thing he would be able to tell someone even if he was as sick as he was, was that Angel was his and no one else's.

Aunt Doris stopped for a minute, thinking about what her nephew had just said.

_Now he's into the ones from the street. _

"I see. Well I showed all your friends their rooms; did you want me to get you some medicine?"

Angel stood next to her man, throwing her hair out of her face. Collins waved no to his Aunt as he tried to stand up.

"Careful." Benny said as he helped his friend up.

"Goodnight ya'll." Aunt Doris said coyly as she sat in the living room, finishing up her fingernails. That was her way of escaping the world, through her manicures. Once, Aunt Doris was a licensed manicurist, taking a plain nail and turning it into a work of art. But when a man she was in love with took over and clouded her mind, she stopped working at the salon and never looked back.

After Angel got Collins settled into bed, she walked over to Benny giving him a hug. "Thanks for everything Benny."

"Anytime."

The businessman walked down the hall and turned around when Angel spoke to him once more. "Tom has never stopped considering you one of his best friends you know."

Benny turned around, his hands in his pockets. "Neither have I."

As the house finally began to settle, Angel walked around the old house looking at old pictures that were just about everywhere. Collins was everywhere. From a picture of Collins when he was in kindergarten to Collins' senior portrait, there wasn't a table without a picture of Collins. Angel smiled at a picture of Collins and an older girl; they looked a like so she figured they were cousins. Collins was smiling on top of a horse as the teenager held the reigns. This was before all of hardships, the boyfriends and the AIDS. A time of pure innocence. Angel closed her eyes, trying to remember a time in her life before she met Collins, but for some reason she couldn't remember. Collins was all she could see when she closed her eyes, he was all she could remember.

"What are you doin' Miss Angel?" Collins asked leaning on the wall, smiling.

Angel smiled back. "Looking at your old pictures. They're wonderful." Collins sighed as he walked over to his girl, putting his arm around her petite waist. "She loves you so much."

"Yeah, and I loved her."

"She's watching over you, she'll never take her eyes off of you, you're too amazing. She in you and around you, I can feel her. She's definitely in your smile."

Collins blushed slightly as Angel put the picture back in its place on the shelf. "You'll have to tell me who these people are in the pictures."

"I'd love to."

Angel grabbed Collins hand kissing it gently. "Come on, let's go to bed. We have a long day tomorrow, I can feel it."

The professor nodded, squeezing Angel's hand as they walked down the hall towards the bedroom they were sharing for their stay. "Wow! The curtains are amazing!"

"You know, I have a feeling you and Gran would get along great together." Collins chuckled as he wiped away a quick tear.

"I agree she's got wonderful taste in curtains, and grandsons."


	11. Nothing is Too Wonderful

**Authors' Notes: Yay! I can finally update! Hope you guys like! Have a great Thanksgiving! Thank you so much to all of you who have been keeping up w/ my stories, I really appreciate it. **

**I OWN NOTHING (only add-ons & plot).**

**Please read, REMEMBER, review and enjoy!**

**Chapter 11**

The next morning, the group was greeted with smells of home cooked breakfast, something that none of them could ignore. Angel turned over to face Collins in bed, who was still sleeping soundly. Tracing his cheek with her fingers, Angel leaned in kissing him on his cheek. Feeling her touch, the professor opened his eyes immediately smiling at Angel who looked heavenly with the mornings' sun around her. "Morning." She warmly smiled at him. "Morning. How are you feeling my love?" Collins laid his head back sighing deeply. "Better, but just not ready to face the day."

"Hey! Get the heck up you guys! It's food! Real food!" Mimi exclaimed happily from the other side of the door. "We're coming Mimi! ¡Váyase!" Angel said as she threw a pillow at the door. Throwing on one of Collins' old sweatshirts, and pulling her pajama pants over her thighs Angel walked over to Collins' side of the bed sitting next to his legs. "You comin'?" Collins played with Angel's ear a bit, giving her the best smile that he could muster. "In a minute babe." Giving his lips a gentle kiss, Angel stepped into her house shoes opening the door. "Promise?"

"Promise." Collins said saluting her.

The group was happily sitting around the table munching and talking away. Aunt Doris was constantly going back into the kitchen handing Mark plates of food to hand off to the hungry group. "¡Ah mi Dios! You all are acting like a bunch of puercos!" Angel said looking at the group. When Aunt Doris returned with a humongous pitcher of orange juice, Angel fled over to the woman. "I am so sorry about this, I don't know what's got into them-"

"That's alright, I figured ya'll were starving. Where is it that you live again?" Angel's expression fell. "Well, we appreciate you feeding us." Not giving Collins' Aunt anymore room for her to badger her, Angel sat herself down next to Mark who was currently cleaning his camera. "Zoom in on the group eating as if they had never eaten real food in their lives." "Not like this we haven't!" Roger said his mouth filled with food. The film maker rolled his eyes, facing the camera towards Angel, who played with her glass of orange juice. "Angel, you okay?" Mark said quietly, turning the camera off. The drag queen looked up at her friend, finally giving him a genuine smile. "Fine dear." Mark nodded, pushing a plate of waffles her way. "Eat. Don't worry about her, she just doesn't understand us." Angel smiled once more, poking her fork into a waffle. "I hope so hunny. But you know I have a feeling that we're not going to be welcomed in this house much longer. I know when I'm not wanted, and she definitely doesn't want _me_ in this house."

Benny stood up when he spotted a weary Collins. "Well there he is! Come on man, have a seat your Aunt went all out for us this morning." Angel glanced over to her man, blowing him a kiss as he sat down in Benny's old seat next to her. Kissing her gently on the cheek, Collins smiled at everyone immediately taking a plate for himself.

After everyone had eaten, the girls including Angel began to help Aunt Doris straighten up the house while the guys walked into the front yard. "Actually, I'm not gonna need your help. Why don't you go outside with the rest of the guys?" Aunt Doris said almost shooing Angel out of the kitchen. Mimi looked up to Angel who was obviously hurt by the woman's treatment of her. "I'd like to stay in here if it's alright with you and help clean up." The older woman gave Angel the look up, returning to the kitchen. Sighing slightly, Angel regained her composure beginning to pick up leftover plates. Maureen walked over to Angel, placing her hand on Angel's lower back. Feeling Maureen's presence, Angel moved so that she wouldn't touch her. "You know if you guys were _that_ upset you would have said something to her." Maureen looked at her friend. "I'm sorry baby; we're just trying to get the things that Collins needs so that we can get the hell out of here."

Benny took a sip of his orange juice, looking out at the lawn. "God, she really fucked this place up." Collins who was sitting on the step looked up at Benny. "Yeah, tell me about it." Mark filmed the place, shaking his head behind the lens. "We should fix this place up man." Roger stamped out his cigarette before returning to the group. "Yeah, that's a good idea. But I think we should find the papers that you need Tom before your Aunt goes to far with her shit talking." "Roger-" Mark said putting his camera into his bag. "What do you mean?" Collins asked standing up, brushing the dirt off of his jeans. "Your Aunt has been fucking with Angel since we got here man."

Angel angrily brushed past the performance artist handing Collins' Aunt the plates. "Now why don't you go _outside_ with the rest of the men-"

"You know what I'm sick of you insulting me." Angel said angrily, slowly stepping up to the woman.

"Angel, calm down." Mimi said grabbing Angel's arm.

"No, let him talk honey." Aunt Doris said to Mimi. "Let him talk."

"What is it that you have against me? Against Tom?"

"Let me tell you one thing, I don't like what you are and I don't like that you've brought it in my mothers house! So I suggest you get outside with the rest of the men like you belong before I make something else of it." Turning around, Aunt Doris carried her stack of plates, her red ringer nails scratching the bottom of them.

"Fuck you." Angel said trying to pull herself from now Mimi and Joanne's grip. The older woman stopped in her tracks, turning around and walking up to Angel who was ready for whatever this woman had to give her. Slowly, the older woman poked her blood red nails into Angel's skin. "Watch your mouth faggot."

Freeing herself from Joanne's grip, Angel took her right hand pushing Collins' Aunt with all of her might. "Fuck you bitch! You're the reason why Collins doesn't have his grandmother!" The older woman slammed into the wall, causing a picture of Collins to crash to the floor. Looking around, Aunt Doris picked up a plate arming herself with it. "Come at me again mother fucker." Angel ripped herself from her friends' grip, coming at the older woman. "Oh my God Angel!" Mimi screamed at the top of her lungs.

Things went dark, and she felt out of control as the blood slowly ran down her face. Maureen screamed running out of the house to get the guys. Angel collapsed backwards onto Joanne, slowly running in and out of consciousness. All Angel could remember was the older woman standing over her as she finally closed her eyes.


	12. Subtle Dreame Disguised

**Author's Notes: Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays to everyone! There's nothing like eating a fantastic meal and then completely lazing about for the rest of the evening. I love it! Here's another chapter for ya!**

**I OWN NOTHING (only add-ons & plot).**

**Please read, review and enjoy!**

**Chapter 12**

Collins held onto the unconscious Angel, who didn't respond to anything as Roger sped down the highway in search of a hospital. "Tom! Where the fuck is the hospital?!" the Rocker was panicked as he heard no response from Collins who was in complete shock. Angel's blood began to soak his pants and Collins yelped out when he felt the warm blood feeling like it was almost trickling down his leg. "Oh my fucking God." The professor cried out as he wiped his clean hand of the stress that he'd never experienced before. Quickly pulling the car over, Roger ran out of the car running towards the gas station attendant who quickly ran out to him giving him directions. The rocker jumped back into the car making a large U-turn in the middle of the street. "Hold on Angel! God dammit!" He screamed as they accidentally sped past a police car that was waiting for them it seemed. The officer placed his sirens on immediately, trying to flag them down. "Fuck!" He yelled as he placed his foot on the gas. "Ang…" Collins said gently caressing Angel's blood stained cheek. "Baby…please." The older man completely fell apart crying out Angel's name. Roger quickly looked into the rear view mirror trying to catch glimpses of one of his best friends as well as the police officer who was speaking into the loudspeaker. "Fuck you pig! Don't you understand what the fuck is going on?!" Roger was completely hysterical weaving in and out of traffic.

By the time the guys had ran back into the house, Collins' Aunt was already throwing them out. "Get the hell out of my house! How dare you disrespect her! Get out!" When no one moved out of fear, Aunt Doris stormed into the kitchen grabbing the biggest knife she could find. "Get out. Now." She said through her teeth. Mark grabbed the rest of their things, lugging huge amounts of bags over his arm as Collins' Aunt watched them impatiently knife still in hand. Benny swiftly ran back into the house past Collins' Aunt as she watched Mark more carefully than anything. He ran into Gran's room, trying to remember where Collins said that her papers were placed. Hearing Collins' Aunt yelling at Mark to take everything, Benny finally remembered grabbing the papers from the back of the dresser. There was so many of them that Benny didn't know which ones he should take so he took the nearest bag shoving the papers into the bag, zipping it up with fervor. As cool and collected as he could, Benny walked back into the living room slipping by Collins' Aunt as she eyed him angrily. "Get out." She snarled at Benny who still thanked her for her hospitality. Collins' Aunt yelled at them to get off of the property while the group began to pile into the two remaining cars. As Benny opened the trunk, he spotted the still gorgeous Mimi running toward Gran's old rose garden taking the only live bloom which was a stunning pink. "Chica! Come on!" Maureen yelled tears spilling from her eyes as she motioned for Mimi to get into the car. The dancer finally sprinted back to the car as Collins' Aunt watched them back out of the driveway and out of sight.

Roger finally reached the hospital coming to an abrupt stop which caused Collins to tighten his grip on his Angel who's face was beginning to turn a shade of blue. "She's not breathing! Oh my God!" Collins screamed as he kicked the car door open, holding Angel in his hands. The police officer jumped out of the car yelling at Collins to stay in the car but the professor heard nothing as he held onto Angel trying to run into the hospital. Roger laid his head back against the seat; he didn't have anything on him. No wallet means no license or ID. The car was registered in Angel's name who was presently unconscious and who didn't have a license either. "Shit." He muttered as he placed his hands on the steering wheel waiting for the officer to walk up to him. "Sir, why is it that you were trying to run away from me?" Roger shook his head knowingly. "I wasn't try-"

"Apparently you were. I had you going 80 in a 65 zone." The officer took out a pad and paper writing down the license plate number as he spoke. "Let me see your license and registration number please."

"Fuck."

"Where the hell are we going to go?! We need to be with Angel!" Mimi yelled hitting the backseat angrily with her fist. "Take me to Angel!" Mark tried to calm the dancer down but there was no use in trying. "I can't believe that fucking bitch! She hit Angel like she had done it a million times before! Like she meant nothing to the fucking world!" Benny looked around eyeing the nearest motel that was next to a diner and marketplace. "We'll stay here." This worried Mark a bit; Collins knew that they didn't have any money and that they'd only be here for a day or so. "Benny, we don't have any money." The businessman looked into the rear view mirror. "Don't worry about it man. Let's just get our rooms and try to find the hospital."

Collins was being held by a nurse who couldn't help but look at the amount of Angel's blood that he was covered in. "Sir, let me take you to the restrooms so that you can clean up a bit." The professor ripped his hand away from the woman. "No. Please, just leave me alone. I appreciate your kindness, but I don't care about anything but that human being do you understand?" The woman nodded in assurance, grabbing papers that Collins needed to sign. The professor sat down scribbling down as much as he could of Angel's information, surprising himself with how clearly he was thinking at a time like this.

The group arrived at the hospital a view of Roger sitting on the curb with his hands cuffed behind his back shaking his head. Collins' and Angel's car was being towed while the rest of the group pulled up. "What the hell is going on?" Joanne asked Maureen as she quickly parked the car, buttoning her coat up trying to look as professional as she could. "Officer, what has this man done?" Joanne said in her lawyer voice. Mimi saw her man on the curb and ran out of the car to him. "Roger!" She called out to him. Roger's eyes lit up when they met Mimi's. "Meems, baby stay away okay." Maureen grabbed Mimi pulling her back towards the car. Mark ran out as well, putting his hand through his hair. "Mark, take Mimi and Maureen to find where they've placed Angel." Benny said as he too tied up his coat trying to look professional. Mark did what he was told pulling the girls who wanted to watch.

Collins sat in the waiting room, his face nervously in his hands as he cried his eyes out. A nurse would come and place a cup of water on the small table next to him, but he'd never see it, he'd never see or realize anything until he knew that his Angel was out of harms way. Collins' thought were broken when the doctor called out Angel's name. "Is the family of Angel Schunard here?"

The professor jumped up meeting the tall man. "Here. How is he?" The man pushed the glasses up his nose eyeing Collins' carefully. "Sir, I am going to need Mr. Schunard's actual _family_." Collins held out his hand in protest. "Man, I've heard it all before. I am all that Angel has. Is he going to be okay?" The man looked around him then finally back at Collins who was beginning to become panicked. "He's going to be fine. He just needs rest. He's lost a lot of blood and has suffered a concussion. We stitched his head up and he'll need to be hospitalized for a few days before we can let him let out."

"Can I see him?" Collins said expectantly.

"Only for a minute," The man said sternly. "He needs rest like I said. No more than you for about a day or so. I will alert the nurse of this; if there is anyone else in this room other than you I won't let you see the patient."


End file.
